Ember Kitty... 2002-2007

I called the vet's this morning to check on the status of Ember. According to my dates, her 10 day quarantine was up yesterday. I had specifically asked to not be notified *before* they put her down. I didn't want to spend the day watching clock and wondering what what was happening at that moment. So this afternoon, I worked up the courage to call out to the office and ask about her. They connected me with Trisha, one of the techs. Trisha told me they put Ember down late last night. I asked how she was up till then, and she said she had been doing fine, eating, sleeping, playing in the cage. I asked if she had shown any signs of rabies, and Trisha said 'well, it was still early for that...' I said I understood that it could still show up later, but I wanted to know if she had shown any signs at this point. Trisha said no, she hadn't as of last night.

So my kitty is now gone. No more nights researching, trying to find a way out for her or a way around what happened. No more what-ifs. She was truly lucky to live as long as she did. She had been dumped at the vet's when she was 2 weeks old. The staff there nursed her along, saving her life. They all had a soft spot for Ember (they named her) and asked about her often. We adopted her when she was 6 months old after we lost our (2nd) lab puppy, Moses. We were able to give her a home where she could roam freely, and roam she did!

I know it sounds harsh, but she was really a useless cat, lol! She was very skittish, suspicious and not very trusting. It took her a good year before she would seek us out for attention, but even then, she never liked to be held, but she did love to have her neck and her ears rubbed. She wouldn't sit on your lap, but she'd come running when she knew you were in the bathroom so she could rub against your legs and have you rub her ears. She knew when you had a bowl of cereal and would pace in front of you, even jump up on the table or computer desk if you were eating there, and try to sneak a bite from your bowl! Poor Elijah, he sure tried his best to get her to play with him, but she would have none of that! She did enjoy teasing him though!

I keep walking past the kitchen and pantry windows and expect to see her silky black form sunning herself there, but the window is bare. I expect to find her laying on her back on the dining room floor, in all of her fat cat glory, but she's not. I go down to get a load of laundry and expect to see her laying on the top step on Paul's coverall pant leg that dangles on the floor, but she's not; the pant leg lays there bare with black cat hair scattered on it, proof of her recent presence. She had the most beautiful, softest black fur...I will never forget how soft she was, and I will miss the feel of her.

I sit at the computer at night and hear noises in the other room and tell myself 'it's just Ember', but it's not, and then I wonder what the noises are? I am paranoid that there will be yet another bat down here and pity the next one that does show up; I no longer see them as the useful creatures God intended them to be, but as a deceiver who enticed my curious kitty to come closer, pulling her into harm's way. Her life was never the same after that day.

It's time to move forward. I know this, I understand this, and I am really OK with this. But it doesn't make it hurt any less right now, at this moment.

Rest in peace, Ember kitty. We will miss you!